Is Life Fair?

"Life isn't fair. Get used to it."  Bill Gates

I shared this quote the other day on Twitter, noting that it seemed a bit cynical to me. I immediately received an RT from someone who didn't think it was cynical - it was the truth.  Life isn't fair. More people agreed - and frankly, I was shocked.

 I kinda pushed back and one person responded using the earthquake in Haiti as an example that life is not fair - and how could anyone think it was?

I think life is fair.

Before you jump to the assumption I've never had anything bad happen to me so of course life's fair - think again. I've had more than my share of ugliness - sickness, death, betrayal and just plain horrible stuff. But I still think life is fair in the balance of all things.

But then, it does depend on how you define 'fair', now doesn't it?  

• If 'fair' means that everyone gets exactly what they want all the time - then the world probably isn't fair. 
• Or is 'fair' getting what you want part of the time -with a few tough times thrown in as reasonable balance?
• Does fair apply as a balance across the populace or is it just about our own personal experience of fairness?
• What if something you think is fair is actually perceived as unfair by someone else? What's fair then?

So when is life 'fair'?

Life surely seemed fair when we were on a roll.

Think about life during the boom years. Money was flowing, everyone was enjoying the BIG upside and life was viewed as fair by most.  In the Silicon Valley  life was REALLY fair. We bought houses using options that wouldn't vest for six or more years. We knew life was fair and we'd be rewarded like everyone else in the valley. (I'd like to note: that popular home buying trend wasn't exactly a secure or sensible way to take on big debt.) 

Today, life isn't viewed as fair in the Valley. Those homes are going into foreclosure, the big dollar salaries for folks with minimal experience have vanished.  You can hear the protests all around that life just isn't fair! 

I'm not saying that times right now are not tough for a lot of folks.  I know they are. But - is that 'unfair' or simply a balance to the over the top 'fairness' we enjoyed five years ago?

What about Human responsibility for fairness?

I also believe that  acts of Humanity influence our collective energy - and the fairness of our lives.  Wall Street was a great example of that. Those leaders did things that were beyond unfair - and their actions brought a wide spread, and unfair, impact to our economy.  Does that mean life isn't fair?  Seems to me a select few brought that unfairness on all of us.

Tomorrow I'll share my own personal beliefs about fairness - and our power to create our lives.

In the meantime, what do you think about life and fairness? I want to know - because I only have my own answer - and I'd love to hear yours!

Comments

[Rebel Brown]

Thanks so much for all your comments.

I knew we'd be split on this topic and I appreciate All of you sharing your thoughts.

Rhino and Yael - you guys made me smile with your positive and upbeat responses!

David buddy - how are you? I can totally see where you're coming from. But my Buddhist/LOA beliefs lean toward the idea that everyone comes into this world for a lesson to be learned and we can't look at another life and decide what's fair or unfair for them. For all we know in their last physical existence those people were wealthy and leaders - and this time they chose to experience their physical existence differently. I know that's not the mainstream Christian belief - but it's still what I believe - and a few others in this world. But I do get the guilty thing - we have more, they have less. So that's unfair. That was drilled into my head for my Christian upbringing and it took lots of therapy to get over it:) Still - I respect your perspective cause we all have the right to see things in our own way!

Wally - kinda the same thoughts as to David. How do we know spirits (before they become physical beings) don't CHOOSE their biological situation as an experience they want to have as part of their own evolution? What if we all have to experience both the good AND the bad so that we can grow and evolve as the non-physical beings we are - beyond this single existence?

GREAT thoughts and great conversations guys! Thanks so much. Tomorrow I'll post some more of my thoughts and learnings from my own life. Would love to learn more about yours as well!

Have a great week!

reb

[Wally Bock]

Here I am, agreeing with Bill Gates. For me "fair" is a measure of whether or not everyone gets an equal opportunity. By that measure life is unfair. Some of us win the sperm lottery and start with more. Some of us have more opportunities than others.

[David Kay]

I can't drive past the hard-working people picking berries or lettuce in the Salinas Valley, or think about the people in Subsaharan Africa, or so many other people in the world, and imagine for a minute that life is "fair."

At some level or another, all of us reading this blog -- to one extent or another -- have won what Warren Buffet calls "the ovarian lottery." My life is so much better than fair, or what I deserve, that it's hard to believe.

Life's not fair, and we've all come up on the winning side. It's worth remembering. (As Gates, through his current actions, is.)

[Yael Brisker]

Hi Rebel
I love the way you put this - what is fair`? "Fair" reminds me of "good" or "bad". As Shakespeare put it : "Things are only good or bad because people make them so ( or call them so ...)". That resonates for me. Personally I believe more in talking in terms of needs, which are universal and are not black or white. Thanks for an interesting post!

[Rhino_Marketing]

what a great read! I agree 100%. I feel my life given has been more than fair although it has been bad at times and other times I have been on top of the world. I feel blessed after reading this.